Surprising Shower Guest Effects

Guest list editing is never fun. Then end result is that people who are a part of someone's life enough to make the list in the first place has now been demoted to either stand-by or of the list altogether. Even if they weren't close to us (bride and groom), they were close enough to some family member to get on the list in the first place.

That being said, our guest list reductions weren't so bad. We had one major day of reductions, and then we were at a pretty reasonable number. (Read: We had a pretty decent guest-imate with a decent sized alternate list, since we have limited space, and no idea how many people will actually be able to make the journey.) So... we're good.

Then people started being generous. Next thing we knew, we have 3 showers planned for us!! So we started divvying up the guest list by who knew who etc, so that no one ended with with a party full of people they didn't know, and also so that no one ended up being invited to all 3 parties. We're still good.

Then the first shower-thrower tells us that she is thinking about 100-120 people. umm.... our entire wedding is only going to ahve about 150-175 guests!! And, as I've said before, we are having a destination wedding in my hometown. So most (and by most I mean about 80%) of our guests don't live here and we are hoping to get them to fly in for the wedding....AND a shower?? ummm....We are no longer all good.

Or at least, that's what my mother thought. On top of that, someone told her that 50% or less of invited guests will RSVP with a "yes". (I don't think that takes in to account the bananas economy and that our wedding could be seen as a mini beach vacation.) So now all of a sudden, my mother has not only moved a good chunk of the stand-by list up to top priority, but she's added to the list!!!

Anyone surprised in going from thinking things are under control to way out of whack due to wedding showers??

Photography: In the Moment

So I've told you the background of "picking our photographer"... which in reality was me convincing everyone else that while I chose our photographer 1 day after getting engaged solely based on 1 friend's recommendation, I had made a really good choice. So I thought I would post a few photos that exemplify what I mean by "you don't have to be there to understand."

Note: I was not a guest at any of these weddings.

This picture just made me smile and want to shout "mazaltof!"

This just captures not only a pretty bride, but a genuinely happy, beautiful soul.

I have no idea what this man said, but I laughed anyway.

I am a goofball. There will probably be moments like this at my wedding... and while I probably won't put them in my formal album - I sure as heck want those moments captured!

Pictures like these I want to put in my album. You can feel the emotion and they have an artistic flare.

I don't know what she was laughing at, but it made me giggle.

I am a fan of all things water... and thus a fan of this photo.

Can we say "frame it and stick it on the wall, please?"

Nothing better than capturing a happy bride in her "unassuming, it's all about me" moment. (Yes, I know thats a contradiction in terms. But look at the picture and tell me that doesn't fit. She's not pompous but she's walking down the middle of the street without a care in the world, knowing no one else would dare mess with her moment. And time seems to have stood still around her.... hmm... sounds a lot like walking down an aisle!)

And this one is just cool.

Ok. So there is a quick snippet of why I love Rae Leytham Photography. Go check out her blog for MANY MANY more reasons to love. Seriously, some photographers create pictures that make any bride look like she just stepped out of a magazine. Some take a very avant guard approach for artsy shots. Some can make it look like you were actually married in 1940. Those are all great. But I don't think there is anything better than a photographer that can make any viewer (read blog-stalker) laugh or cry or smile or aww at photographs of moments they have no other connection to. Isn't that the point of photographing the wedding? So you can share with others, and other generations what it was like to be there in that moment?

Funny Fortunes Disguised as Tradition

I am not a fan of tossing the bouquet. One too many weddings where I was called out by a DJ and dragged out onto the floor where I promptly dove out of the way. And that was when I had a date! Needless to say I really had no intention of incorporating that or the garter toss in our wedding. (Don't get me wrong, I think the garter thing could be some sexy fun.... if my parents weren't going to be there!!!! I just think thats weird.) And then I saw this from Martha Stewart...
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The traditional toss bouquet, when caught, tells one lucky receiver little more than that she will be the next to wed. But this distinctive toss bouquet is made up of a cluster of smaller bouquets, each bearing its own secret fortune that offers more detailed information about future husbands to a few agile guests. And for the bride, they form a lush bouquet of blossoms.

Fortune Bouquets How-To
Separate flowers into small bouquets; you can use one variety or combine several (we used roses, calla lilies, and ranunculuses). Wrap the stems of each bunch with seam binding, securing with a bow; leave ends trailing. Prepare predictions about future husbands -- "You will marry the boy next door"; "You will marry your true love" -- for the
bouquets. Print the fortunes onto a sheet of fine paper, and cut the paper so that each fortune appears on a single strip; finish the ends in an inverted V. Use a straight pin to affix each fortune to its bouquet.

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I think I might make them quirkier fortunes:

• You will gain admiration from your pears.
• Help! I am being held prisoner in a Chinese bakery!!
• Confucius say, man who eat crackers in bed wake up feeling crummy.
  

=D

Can't get through a whole wedding without a little snarkiness and I certainly can't be sarcastic in my vows! ... or can I? ;-)

Vendor Bender: Photography

So we booked our venue. Now its on to vendors... we started with photographers.. and not on purpose.

Let me start by saying this: Research research research.

That being said, I actually chose my photographer the morning after I got engaged on one persons' recommendation. I didn't book her until a few months later and LOTS of research, but in my head, all along I pretty much knew.

My crazy scavenger hunt proposal took place on a January Saturday (If you haven't seen the slideshow yet - Click and watch. It was amazing and I still want to share it with the world at every chance I get). Monday morning I told a friend at work (we'll call him Guru) and his response was
"Congratulations! Rae Leytham."
Me - "umm - no - my name is Michelle."
Guru "No, Rae Leytham is your photographer."
Me - "We don't even know where or when we are getting married! We only get engaged on Saturday."
Guru - "Doesn't matter. Rae Leytham. Here is the website. Here are my favorite photos. Hands down best photographers. Husband and wife team that also have the best equipment and back ups of everything. You don't even have to be there to understand the moment." (I'll explain that last remark in another post.)
Me - "Ok then. Rae Leytham it is."

A few hours later I go home to my now fiance:
Me - "Rae Leytham is going to be our photographer. And I got a few recommendations on great cake bakers in the area."
Adam "Don't plan the whole wedding without me!!" (This was one of my favorite real life love moments.)

My family was INCREDIBLY skeptical of my being so attached to the idea of one photographer before I had even researched the other possibilities. The next few months were filled with lots of research of prices, style, locations, styles, albums, personalities etc. And then in May - we signed the contract with Rae. =D Thank you Guru!

I promise my next few posts will detail the rest of the photographers we considered, and what really sent everyone over the edge for Rae.

Anyone else make a quick decision that ended up being fantastic?

Guest Test

I found this on CNN today and thought it could be helpful... and then I kept reading...

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By Audrey Irvine
CNN

(CNN) -- One of my girlfriends recently got engaged. Before we could even bask in her happiness, the conversation turned to the dreaded guest list.

Audrey Irvine was not only invited to her cousin's wedding in 2004, she served as a bridesmaid.

Fun questions like, "So, honey, do we have to invite your great aunt, whom you haven't seen since you were 10?"

So, who should get an invite?

Too often, women are pressured into inviting way too many people to their weddings out of a sense of obligation. Parents, prospective in-laws and grooms can turn a simple wedding into a grand affair.

And as soon as that engagement ring catches her eye, that occasional lunch acquaintance feels entitled to share in your happy nuptials.

Then you realize too late that the majority of people at your wedding don't really know you or what has been going on in your life up until your big day.

This quiz is something I shared with friends years ago and feel inclined to share with other women.

Here are 10 questions couples can use to trim that guest list and weed out the people you really don't want at your wedding.

1) Name the city I'm living in now (Good one to weed folks out, especially if you have moved a lot. Don't use this if you've lived in the same place for 10 years).

2) Name at least two of my closest friends.

3) Name my current employer and my past employer (Again, if you've remained in the same job for 15 years, this does not apply).

4) Do I have any kids?

5) Do you know the name of my fiancé? Bonus question: Where and when did we meet?

6) Do you know where my parents are and whether they are still alive? (Imagine a friend at your wedding asking how long have your parents been married when they divorced years ago).

7) Name at least two of my hobbies.

8) How old am I? (My favorite is when family friends would query, 'Are you 28 now?" Imagine their surprise when I proclaimed, 'yeah, 10 years ago!')

9) Where did I go to college? (Some people might not remember whether you attended college or even graduated.)

10) Name my last boyfriend before this engagement. Bonus question: if you can name the last two and why we broke up. If you get the bonus question right, that might automatically get you in.

Scoring helps determine whether you get invited.

If you score 50 percent or below, you definitely are not getting invited.

If you score barely over 50 percent, you are on the waiting list. If someone who scored better than you cannot attend, you might get an invitation. This barely acceptable person who might be invited may get you a great gift because of their guilt for scoring so low.

If you score over 60 percent, you get an invitation.

Now, you don't have to be as extreme as I would love to be and send these questions with the save the date card. However, imagine if, over the course of your engagement, you pitch these questions to a few prospective guests just to see how they do.

In the end, what matters most is a beautiful wedding day and a sustained marriage.

Wouldn't you like to celebrate it with loved ones who are invested in your past and present in addition to your future? Plus, it will help you avoid the embarrassing introduction of your new husband to someone who didn't even realize until that moment that you didn't marry your college sweetheart, whom you haven't seen in 15 years!
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In theory, this sounds great, simple and straightforward.
Ok. How about in reality? umm.. when am I supposed to ask people theses questions? Do I give them a heads up for this quiz? Do they know what's at stake if they get the answer wrong?

Oh yeah. And I can't be the only bride out there who's parents are footing the bill for this party! Can I? My parents want their friends and coworkers there. Sometimes its a E.Post propriety thing, and sometimes its a friend thing. Regardless, I often have to be reminded of these people's names or connections to the family. But guess what? They are still on the guest list.

Anyone else love the thought of using this quiz, but laugh at the thought of really implementing it?

Capricious Creativity: Chair Signs

I like the idea of these chair signs. I saw the one above on Sparkliatti, and the idea sort of stuck in my head. As I have mentioned before, I am not detail oriented and I really have no patience for looonnng tedious repetitive tasks... hence the capricious before the creativity in my DIY series. So while I liked the chair signs, I certainly wasn't about to make them our escort cards. And then Jessica of Tying the Knot posted this:

hmm.. signs just for the Bride and Groom. I like it! And while the bird theme is NOT a part of our wedding (I grew up on the gulf coast - lots of seagulls; thus, in general, I hate birds), but the double layer of paper and the ribbon really looks nice! Its very neat and tidy, which is very Adam, but I could make it in our blues and making add a little sparkle to make it very me. So when Adam had a late flight, I went to Hobby Lobby. (I should never be allowed to go to a craft store alone. Great ideas! ... that tend to sit in the corner and go unfinished.) I found plain ol' 8.5x11 paper in the scrapbook aisle in our blues! Sweet! And then I found pretty sparkly ribbon. Score!

As pictured above, you can notice that I printed on regular paper 1st to get the spacing and size right. Highly recommended. Also from above you can infer that I am not a craft oriented person. See my tools? Oh yeah. Thats a box cutter and a cutting board and a 90 degree "L" ruler used for carpentry.

No cutting here! (Did I mention I am TERRIBLE at straight lines... in anything!?) I just used glue dots to attach the ribbon to the darker blue sheet.

Then I trimmed the light blue paper and added more glue dots to attach. I left the ribbon rather long so it can be adjusted for whatever looks best on the chairs.
VOILA! Chair signs!
Incredibly simple, I know. It's not exactly goccoing your own invites, but its something I made that represents both Adam and I that will be featured in our wedding. So I am proud of them darnit!
One problem... I showed them to my mother... Now she wants one's for the parents seats too! ok - back to Hobby Lobby for me!

(Ah - and for any inquiring minds - thats Zapfino font, which we will use throughout our wedding because its a little pizazz without being curly-girly, and EVERY computer program has it.)

Anyone else proud of a really simple DIY? hmm.. come to think of it, 2 out of 3 of my DIYs have been pretty simple. Oh well! (Barefoot Sandals, and guests Flip Flops)

Fantastic Friday: Real Wedding

As we all head off into the wonder that is the weekend, I thought I would share with you some photos from a friend's wedding...

Julieanne and Steven are hitched!! How great are some of these photos!? Oh, and my little 'ol blog just doesn't do them justice. Go on over the SB Childs Photography for better viewing (and more pictures)... and while you are there, check through some of the other posts.. I think I might start stalking this blog too!

How great a shot is this? I love it in the sepia tone; it just fits the beautiful old mansion feel.

And how great is Julieanne's beautiful gown? Anyone who is trying to figure out where they can get it, forget it. It was her mothers! She had it revamped and I think its beautiful. (And I am a little jealous!)

Can anyone guess what Steven does?

Gabe looks SOOOOOO adorable! I mean, he's a cute baby, so he's always got an adorable factor... but in a little tux onesie thing? SOOO CUTE! Of course, with these two as parents - of course he's cute! ;)

Loving this shot, even though they are posed, they just don't seem to even care that anyone else in anywhere near by because they are so into each other.

I think this might be my favorite shot. How fun!

No... maybe this one is my favorite. VERY Julieanne. =)

AWW!! I wonder if Gary (Dad of the Bride) got teary eyed.

Obviously they had a good time at their reception.

Ready to make their great escape...

And what better way to make an escape than in this beauty!?!

Many congrats!!!